Mike Nicholls (not to be confused with the director of the similarly spelled name variety), A Flinders University professor (not to be confused with the famous cartoon lefty from the Simpsons with the similarly spelled name) has conducted a study that suggests left-handed people have lower cognitive abilities.  (click for full story at IO9)

Do I not get why seemingly intelligent people watch reality TV with such fervor because I’m a lefty?  Is it because I’m mentally impaired?

Well that’s just f@cked up right there.

(Click the link for full story at IO9) 

Goddammit, I just said that, didn’t I?  Maybe they’re right.  I guess I’ll start watching Real Housewives of WhoGivesARatsass and pretend I understand why.  First they made the scissors and the notebooks unwieldy and I said nothing… now it’s goddamned Snookie and the Duggar Clown Car Womb Extravaganza and it’s too late to say anything.  Damned elitist smarty right-folk.

"Okay coffee... make now."